General Motors To Buy Back Their Common Stock with Change Found In-between The Seats

The company is asking employees to help its sagging stock price by using the change underneath and in-between seats of their GM cars to buy the common stock of the company.
“When you have to ask yourself Mickey D’s dollar menu or major ownership in GM please choose the later,” begged the contact in charge of investor relations.
This comes after the failed “Help GM Kids and Stock” displays in laundry mats didn’t bring in anticipated revenues.